Thursday, February 26, 2004
The F-word
I spoke to J today. and she dropped the f-word on me... the five letter kind. Which i somehow knew was coming. and even though i know its for the better still kind of bumming. I really liked her. But as the Dido song says - You said one day youd found the sweetest thing of all and that one day of this was worth dying for. So be thankful you knew her at all. Which is a good chord with me these days. Im happy for the chance. although id be less confused if she hadnt made out with me. But its probably just one of those things you have to do to see if it feels right and it didnt for her.
Which leads me to H. I always think of H when i need a shoulder to lean on. We havent talked to each other in a few months, there really isnt much point. But i do still miss her. She happened to be the one who always made me feel right. So right that i got lost in that feeling and walked away from her. Only to realize that i only had that feeling with her. I do believe i can find that feeling again. But once youve had it with someone its always easy to think back on them in that longing fashion.
I not super bummed about all thats happened im taking them as life experiences and i know new things are just around the corner or every minute and every second.
So my advice to myself and to you is live life like there is no tomorrow because there might not be...
Comments-[ comments.]
I spoke to J today. and she dropped the f-word on me... the five letter kind. Which i somehow knew was coming. and even though i know its for the better still kind of bumming. I really liked her. But as the Dido song says - You said one day youd found the sweetest thing of all and that one day of this was worth dying for. So be thankful you knew her at all. Which is a good chord with me these days. Im happy for the chance. although id be less confused if she hadnt made out with me. But its probably just one of those things you have to do to see if it feels right and it didnt for her.
Which leads me to H. I always think of H when i need a shoulder to lean on. We havent talked to each other in a few months, there really isnt much point. But i do still miss her. She happened to be the one who always made me feel right. So right that i got lost in that feeling and walked away from her. Only to realize that i only had that feeling with her. I do believe i can find that feeling again. But once youve had it with someone its always easy to think back on them in that longing fashion.
I not super bummed about all thats happened im taking them as life experiences and i know new things are just around the corner or every minute and every second.
So my advice to myself and to you is live life like there is no tomorrow because there might not be...
Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Its gonna be a good day
Thats my current motto for the time. Things are going well. Except for the lack of internet at my new job. They seem to think people wouldnt do work if given unlimited access to the net... what are they thinking??
Anyways im at the new job.
But thats probably not the interesting stuff.
Last weekend i went and watched my first rugby game. Actually it was the finals of the nationals or what not. I was totally impressed it was fast it was fun it was entertaining. I got to watch sports with athletes who arent doing it for the money. And the crowd appreciated it. The crowd gave around of applause to every team even the ones who lost i thought that was great. Sportsmanship. who wouldve figured.
Then i saw Linkin Park last night. Was alot better than i thought. I enjoyed the concert and released for a bit. Granted it did lead to a late night and a tired me the next morning but what they hey.
Anyways thats all i really got. Hope all are doing well.
Comments-[ comments.]
Thats my current motto for the time. Things are going well. Except for the lack of internet at my new job. They seem to think people wouldnt do work if given unlimited access to the net... what are they thinking??
Anyways im at the new job.
But thats probably not the interesting stuff.
Last weekend i went and watched my first rugby game. Actually it was the finals of the nationals or what not. I was totally impressed it was fast it was fun it was entertaining. I got to watch sports with athletes who arent doing it for the money. And the crowd appreciated it. The crowd gave around of applause to every team even the ones who lost i thought that was great. Sportsmanship. who wouldve figured.
Then i saw Linkin Park last night. Was alot better than i thought. I enjoyed the concert and released for a bit. Granted it did lead to a late night and a tired me the next morning but what they hey.
Anyways thats all i really got. Hope all are doing well.
Friday, February 06, 2004
My last day
Its my last day at my current job. Its sort of surreal. I had a going away lunch yesterday. Its been a long ride 7 years... thats more time then i was at college (6 years). Ive learned alot on this ride. Some of it good some of it bad. And its not like im leaving on bad terms. I didnt get fired, i survived numerous layoffs. It was just time to go. My new job starts next week. A whole new start to my life. Im not really sure what else to say it is all quite surreal
Comments-[ comments.]
Its my last day at my current job. Its sort of surreal. I had a going away lunch yesterday. Its been a long ride 7 years... thats more time then i was at college (6 years). Ive learned alot on this ride. Some of it good some of it bad. And its not like im leaving on bad terms. I didnt get fired, i survived numerous layoffs. It was just time to go. My new job starts next week. A whole new start to my life. Im not really sure what else to say it is all quite surreal
Monday, February 02, 2004
Unsure
So i have my new job to start next week. I still havent recieved my formal offer letter. But ive already given notice here so that i could start at the new job sooner. Its that sort saying 'the check is in the mail' and for all intent and purposes im sure it is but still makes me uneasy. Im leaving the job ive had for 5 full years and two years as in intern. I mean its basically a home to me. Its a safety net of sorts.
Then there is J. Weve been dating for a couple weeks now. Its all going good. Just more uneasiness. Just the fact that im trying to keep on my toes and make everything go well. Its just the uncertainty of it.
All this stuff makes me uneasy. Dont get me wrong i actually like it. Which is really odd for me. Im a very static go with the patterned flow kind of person. But now my world is being pretty shaken up. I mean new job, new girl, finding a new place to live, etc. I feel alive and i feel scared at the same time... Maybe your only really feeling alive when your scared? I dunno. I had a theory on that with dating... You may love that person the most and you feel most alive when your with them because you know they are the person that could hurt you the most and they dont. (Well i suppose sometimes they do).
Thats all i got.
Comments-[ comments.]
So i have my new job to start next week. I still havent recieved my formal offer letter. But ive already given notice here so that i could start at the new job sooner. Its that sort saying 'the check is in the mail' and for all intent and purposes im sure it is but still makes me uneasy. Im leaving the job ive had for 5 full years and two years as in intern. I mean its basically a home to me. Its a safety net of sorts.
Then there is J. Weve been dating for a couple weeks now. Its all going good. Just more uneasiness. Just the fact that im trying to keep on my toes and make everything go well. Its just the uncertainty of it.
All this stuff makes me uneasy. Dont get me wrong i actually like it. Which is really odd for me. Im a very static go with the patterned flow kind of person. But now my world is being pretty shaken up. I mean new job, new girl, finding a new place to live, etc. I feel alive and i feel scared at the same time... Maybe your only really feeling alive when your scared? I dunno. I had a theory on that with dating... You may love that person the most and you feel most alive when your with them because you know they are the person that could hurt you the most and they dont. (Well i suppose sometimes they do).
Thats all i got.
